Do I have the rite to be upset about what he did????
2004-11-16 || 2:12 p.m.
Well I think its time to say that I NEED TO GET OVER CARL & his slutty ass. After everything I do for that guy & try to help him out while he sits on his fricking lazy ass butt & quit the jobs he gets after a WEEK...yeah I think its time for me to stop talking to him. He knows how I feel about him & everything...he knows what bugs me about his "flirting" & as long as Im not there when he sleeps with another girl thats all that matters...but he ruined our friendship last Wednesday nite. He ended up bringing another girl home & FUCKING her with me rite there! He lives in a camping trailer becuz he gets kicked out of everyone elses houses he stays at becuz he cant pay rent without a job[well DUH]& so he lives in his buddies camping trailer rite now & will forever if it doesnt get off his LAZY ASS & get a fucking job & actually KEEP IT!!! Anyway this "home" of his doesnt even have a bathroom or anything. SO he had two beds set up in his "house". I could of went home but didnt becuz a)he had an awesome nite becuz of ME & b)the plan was for US to spend the nite hanging out & stuff. This girl didnt come along until later that nite. So why was I going to spend more money & ruin the plans after doing all this shit for the guy so he can go take some fucking bitch home anyway? Now I wish I would of though but I was too drunk & bitchy that nite to really care. He did no that I didnt want the bitch coming home with us...I just didnt exactly SAY I didnt...cuz Im not going to tell him what he can & cant do in his own house. Fuck that. So in a way its not all his fault becuz I didnt exactly say NO shes not coming home with us. But still he knows I like him as more then a friend & he could of EASILY told her that she can come over tomorrow nite or the next nite OR the next nite. But NO he had to bring the slut home on a nite that was already planned with ME & him. He should know not to do that if he thinks of me as a best friend. All I can still hear going through my head is the sound of her moaning, the rocking of the trailer while they did it which kept me awake all nite, her giggling & him whispering things in her ear[they were on one bed & I was on the other with the curtain closed thank god]. Fucking bitch. It hurt the hell out of me listening to that. Now I regret going there anyway. Do you think I have a reason to mad or no? Should I of told him straight up not to bring her home? Should I forgive him??? What would yall do if this happened? It just pisses me off becuz he knew how I feel about him & he still did this & only cared about being fucked. At least all my co-workers care. I had to tell them becuz when something is bugging me then I cant hide it. They always no when something is wrong. I love my co-workers & so glad I applied & got hired there. Were like friends there & rite now Im the happiest when Im there. If I am off @ 8 I will stay there til my last bus comes @ 11 just to talk to them. I can even hang out with my managers at the bar! I truthfully like hanging out with my co-workers more than anyone else sometimes well besides Allison, Nicole, Petra & my family! Speaking of Petra her baby should of been due yesterday or today! I called her a few times but she isnt calling me back yet I know her & Nicole talked on Friday. I wonder if shes mad at me for something?? Her boyfriend who was supposed to help her take care of the baby broke up with her. What a FUCKING jerk! I hate men sometimes! All the ones I meet are losers! Besides my co-workers who are guys...they arent jerks to me YET. I dont think they ever will be either. Anyway I got to go & sorry for all the jibber jabbering & swearing. What should I do though? I want to ignore his phone calls, I want to answer it & tell him how i feel & I want to change my # on my phone but dont know what to do.... :(