Major bitching about Carl...WARNING: Lots of swearing!
2004-11-18 || 2:49 p.m.
I talked to Carl yesterday after TRYING to ignore his phone calls. But its pretty hard when someone calls your cellphone like 3 damn times in less than a half an hour leaving messages everytime. The good thing is that he knows HE was the one who fucked up & thinks I have every rite to be mad. I told him how I feel about everything I have been bitching about. Like I even told him how Im glad were not dating & that I wouldnt be able to trust him as a boyfriend becuz of how he is with every "hot girl" he sees. Its always "Shes hot" or "Nice rack on that one" or some kind of talk like that. If he was doing that if we were DATING he wouldnt be able to use that piece of equipment of his on ANYONE. We both think it would be better to be friends ONLY. I was supposed to do something with him after school but I did the SMART thing & took a shift for someone at Brewsters instead. Its not the same anymore with him. I dont want everything to be different but shit happens. I wish that fucking stupid slutty fat ass little whore didnt have to be there. Everything would of been fine with us. I cant even look at him the same anymore. The sparks I had when I used to see him are totally not there anymore. Just seeing his face & remembering that nite...its just NOT HAPPENING anymore. I dont know if I can even be his friend anymore quite frankly. We will see how it goes. Just fucking pisses me off how someone you thought of as a best friend[he thought of me as his]could screw someone rite with you there when they know how you feel about them. I can still hear the loud moaning & feel the trailer rocking & it just pisses me off. Im sick of being in a bad mood in front of my co-workers. At least now that Im not sleeping with him anymore I dont have to worry about getting pregnant or getting a disease from any of the skanky fucked up crack whore little slutty bitches that he likes. Why doesnt he think of that? How many of these girls that he sleeps with are actually 100% disease free? He probably doesnt even FUCKING THINK of that! As long as he gets to get some ass from these girls thats all that matters to him. And what about his kids? He has two of them[well one is his biological son]& he keeps fucking around with all these whorebags one of them can end up getting pregnant too & he has another kid to take care of. Whats he going to do? Leave her? Tell her to get an abortion?! What the fucking matter with this guy?! He just pisses me off sometimes when he does what he does! He cant keep jobs either so how is he going to be able to pay for his kids? Im surprised he still gets to see his kids!!! Man if I said everything I said here to his face I would probably be smacked by now..haha! Im just wondering how well we can stay "just friends" & not "fuck buddies". I miss him before he started the major flirting & fucking...when he held my hand in public & it was like we were actually together. Sigh..it would never happen again thats for sure. Its just too weird...sorry buddy. Doing what you did becuz you "were drunk" just might of made you lose the "best friend you ever had" as you say it. But what kind of best friend would do something like that you mother fucker?! Grrr...he pisses me off! We will see how it goes. I have to go to my class now...