Christmas, Carl, resolutions & "Big Baby" me
2004-12-16 || 2:17 p.m.
Me & Carl talked about this whole dating thing on Monday. Thankfully we both feel the same way about it. We both have feelings for each other but weve been friends for so long that its just too weird for us. We can even kiss & do naughty things together & it doesnt feel weird at all. Its weird to date friends anyway. He has changed alot since he fucked that fat bitch a month ago. I mean he still borrows money from me & drinks alot but doesnt flirt too much anymore & seems sweeter. He told me that if I ever have kids he will be an uncle to them & that he wants to be my friend til the day I die. I will never date my friends. I will never date someone with kids who still is friends with their ex. I will never date a co-worker. If we like each other enough then one of us can quit the job & find a new one & THEN date! ;)
I dont know why I cry for no reason. We were soooo busy at Brewsters last nite & I was totally fine. Bitchy but fine. I didnt cry @ all until like an hour after the rush was done. I felt sooo stupid & wouldnt be surprised if the co-workers talked about it behind my back & made fun of me. I wouldnt blame them either. Im frickin 24 years old not 3. If you have no reason to cry then why cry? Why cant the damn tears stay inside? Its not your time to come yet damn tears! Wait until someone I know dies or I get hurt really bad & THEN come. So Christmas break starts tomorrow I beleieve so this will be the last time I can write in my diary until Jan 3 so I will say what I can now.
Does everyone have a New Years resolution?? I have a few even though I never actually DO them & they are pretty much the same ones every year. But these are them.
~Quit smoking
~Talk more
~Learn how to control my crying & temper[I dont have a bad one but I cant help swearing & bitching under my breath when it gets busy at Brewsters]
~Get higher marks next semester
~Speak mind more[Im getting waaay better]
~Get liscense[in spring probably]
~Spend money on better things then smokes & drinks[hey if I listen to my first resolution I will be saving money rite there!]
~Hang out with other friends besides Carl[I seem to always want to go out with him & dont care to hang out with my other friends sometimes & I miss them!]
~SAVE money
Hmmm what else to say...I cant think of anything rite now but I will definitely write in here again if I DO think of something. So have a super dupeo Christmas & New Year everyone!