"John" the Busstop/Convergy's Guy!
2002-04-29 || 9:26 p.m.
For once in my life...what turned out to be a sucky bad nite turned out better in the end. Sundays are always the nites I go see James & I stay until Tuesday. Well last nite I didn't go to his house until late like 10pm becoz we were visiting our mom & stuff. When I called him to tell him I was ready to go he said that he was playing Warhammer with two friends & that he would see me when I got there. What!? Like I know he's not my chauffer or taxi driver or nuthin but it's late & he'd make me wait for the bus even after I told him it doesn't run as often that time of nite? My sister was pissed off @ him for that I tell ya! He said he would pick me up but he didn't trust his car & didn't want to be rude to his guests. Hmmm...or maybe you just didn't feel like doing it? Why does he drive around everywhere else then? Well whatever I'm over that. When I was waiting for my first bus since @ that time of nite I had to transfer..I heard a voice of a guy say "Did the 8 pass yet?" *The 8 is a bus BTW..Route 8* & when I looked at the guy I was like WHOA...! What a hottie! Okay this wasn't so bad waiting for the bus heehee! I will describe this guy..for y'all. He was about 5'7, had spikey streaked hair & i think his eyes were blue but couldn't tell coz of the dark but they looked like they could be. But he was a total hottie & if I had to pick any celebrity he'd look like I'd say someone like Ronan Keating[Boyzone] & David Chokachi[Cody on Baywatch]mixed! Sounds hot eh? We talked about the bus schedules & he looked at his & said the bus won't be there for 12 minutes & I was like "I don't want to wait that long!" & he's like "I'll keep you company" I was all happy inside! I for some reason am starting to attract major hotties! Like him, James & this guy we used to see hanging around Safeway who was REALLY staring like noticably staring & he looked kind of like Johnny Whitworth! =) And then the other cute guys at Denny's talk to me alot these days! Anyway back to the "busstop guy"
okay we talked about the bus schedules, I told him about what James did & he's like "What a jerk!" I had to...I don't know why though.. And he said he works at Convergy's which is a store where they answer phone calls about computers & stuff...& its in the small mall rite across from our apartment! He lives 3 blocks away from Bonnie Doon mall...& wants to move closer! I can't remember what else we talked about but another employee of his came & they started talking about someone there that was a transexual! Just when I was talking to him...looking at him I knew that he is a sweet person & doesnt look like the cheating bastard type at all...I can just tell in his eyes. I dunno its weird. But then I thought James was going to be a really sweet bf but obviously you know everything he did to make me cry & think we weren't lasting too much longer & we are better! I want to see John again[I think thats what his name is coz when they were talking he was naming John's that work there & he's like "Im a John, the little John..." So if it's not John I will call him "John". I hope I see him again though & start being his FRIEND. I am in love with James & would rather stay with him becoz I feel like i would be lost without him which is corny sounding but true! I love him sooo much & I'm sorry for that becoz of all the things he did to me before & even last nite. But I can't help it. I couldn't cheat on him EVER. If "John" did like me like that I'd be happy that he did but would stay no more then friends with him until sometime after me & James broke up if we do...you never know? But if we do stay together for along time I doubt he'd wanna get married & have kids anyway. James is my first boyfriend..my first love & breaking up with him would be so hard on me & would hurt me alot. I would hope that "John" would be my friend by then & that he would be someone who would be there for me to talk to. But i probably won't see him anymore & frankly I don't know if I'd care becoz I love James & I am scared that if I see "John" too much that all the love I have for James would be taken to him & given to "John" & I'd like "John" the same way I liked James since i met him last March. I'm freakin scared it'll happen! I don't want to have different feelings for James, not yet when things are getting better! I want to stay in love with him & yah I can think other guys are cute but I don't want to like them more than James! I will not like myself if i change feelings for James. God that's the problem with other cute guys talking to you when you already have a cute boyfriend you think you love!
I also met this girl Katie when I was waiting for the #6 Bus in Millgate & she's really cool :) I like her! She lives near Milbourne Mall too! And she works in Superstore close to Southgate I think on Calgary Trail South? To people who don't know what I am talking about those are street names & stuff in Edmonton.
Anywho...yah, I hope if I do see "John" again I don't like him in the way I like James. That would be a mess!! Coz I'm a one guy kinda girl & I have a boyfriend who I'm in love with[even if he can make me cry sumtimes]& don't want to lose him...! I'm sorry 2 Deanna & everyone else who tried to make me see the light & know he's an ass...I can't help feeling this way about James...it sucks azz I know but I love him to pieces.
*sigh* well I got to go now. I want to say hi to anyone who is actually reading my diary unless its someone like "Toratoratora"! Anyone who doesn't like me please don't read this. Read ones you like instead! Thankkiezzz!! =D
Luv & Peace xoxo ~*Hugs & Kisses*~ from Renee-Anne