Does he even care about me at all?
2001-12-14 || 7:23 p.m.
Yes...I did it. I finally went somewhere else with James today! Well of course he was already going there anyway to get his new boots...but still! God people i dont know how long we will last. He doesnt seem at all interested in me really unless i am half naked or we are making out! Like get a life & stop thinking that way about me everytime you think of me! You know? Im not even pretty or anything so what does he like about me? im not even his type for crying out loud! Hes into all this kinky handcuffs & oral sex crap, warhammer[u probably no already lol]& things like that when I just like kissing him normally & I like pop music, going to malls & stuff like that...I am not into that kinkiness at all...one day i mite try to do more to him but Im not making any promises that I will like it.
I told him today at the mall that he doesnt need to buy me a Christmas present...just as long as we are together & I was holding his hand & looking rite at him...aint i a sweet girlfriend?? =) I think I was to say that to him...but he mostly made a little noise but was smiling a bit at least...but it would of been better if he seemed just a tad happier that I want to stay with him & everything rite? Well whatever bursts his bubble...or something like that....lol. I am at his house rite now actually but he is gone[thank god coz I wouldnt be riting this then] & so is Ray. Hilarie is in the other room watching TV & reading a book. Hilaries cool...I like her...she doesnt get upset easily & shes not afraid to speak her mind! We both have to take our boyfriends out ourselves...how sad is that? Hilarie had to take Ray out to the Keg becoz he wouldnt take her out himself! Same problem i have with James...what do you expect though? Theyre roommates!!
James & I hardly get to see each other..I mostly see him during shifts together or sometimes after I go home with him after a shift...which is usually early in the morning or late at nite so we stay home & go on the computer or whatever or else go to bed or something...I cant forget Warhammer...of course! Of course i fall asleep when they play that game! I would never tell him to stop playing the game or anything...I couldnt do that...but its all that comes out of his mouth too...I mean hes probably talked about everything he can talk about...over & over again! I hate the game but will probably know so much about it like the names of the armies Chaos Space Marines, Aldar, Blood Angels, Tau & surprisingly i cant remember any others! Oh yeah Dreadnoughts..cant forget them. Ray will be gone when we are home & Hilarie is going home for the nite i believe so James & I will probably be alone...so this is a time we can be alone together..if he wants to take me home I will be pissed becoz i want to spend time with my boyfriend & last nite didnt count becoz i was tired from being up so long the last few days...hes always playing computer games, warhammer & stuff & if hes not going to spend time with me then why am I even there?? =( Im not pissed at HIM Im more pissed that he has to BE this way...=( Well thats all i have to say coz I forgot what else I wanted to say so bu bye! Any gals out there that read this...if you have a boyfriend I hope he actually spends time with you & does things with you & not always with some game! You lucky girls who have sweet awesome boyfriends!! =)