How do I get help these days?
2002-10-15 || 5:24 p.m.
I honestly don't know what to do anymore about my E.D. Sometimes I can't remember if I told you about something or not & don't read my old entries so forgive me if I mentioned this already. I got kicked out of my interaction group a few weeks ago becoz they were worried about my weight problems...& the therapists don't think I am serious enough to need the help they have there but are still doing what they can. James roommate[who I'm not sure would be a friend or not yet]told me about his therapists & said they're really good blah blah & that I sould try talking to them. Well I called them today & the receptionist lady told me that the University of Alberta Hospital people are the experts & that I should stay with them for now & it just seems like no one wants me to get better. Has anyone gotten out of an eating disorder on there own with no proffesional help!? It just seems so hard to becoz once something goes in you...you want it out. I know that feeling so well now & can't fight the urge to purge most of the time. I'm a huge sugar addict so I will want chocolate & crap all the time. 3 Reeses Peices is 277 calories. That's alot but I'm addicted to it!! So then knowing the calories I want it out of me!! The only thing stopping me rite now is that my poor teeth will rot away & thats not helping 100% yet!
I don't know if people don't want me better or not. I mean come on...they think that the seizures happened becoz of my eating disoder[well some peopel do]& they don't think its serious enough for help!? I still get depressed, I still get suicidal, I still have an eating disorder but do doctors want to help me anymore!? NO. Has anyone else had a problem like this? And I do have friends & stuff who want me better but still some people don't care anymore & it just makes me wonder....
Renee